Is it time to try working with a sobriety coach?

Quitting alcohol is bloody tough. It's been over three and a half years since I last had an alcoholic drink, but I still remember those days when I was spiralling; frightened that I couldn't keep drinking like I was, but equally frightened that I couldn't stop.

These memories are raw. Sometimes powered by Facebook flashing the last 15 years of my life back at me on a daily basis; sometimes powered by passing a bar or restaurant I can't remember leaving the last time I was there. There is shame. There is pain.

Quitting alcohol isn't easy; and by the time I got to the point of stopping I had literally years behind me of dry januaries, attempting to moderate and - if I'm being honest with myself - not being honest with myself.

Maybe you are attempting to moderate your drinking. Maybe this is frequency you have decided to drink, or maybe the quantity when you do. I tried both of those, and none were successful. When I told myself I was only going to drink on a certain number of days a week; I tended to have broken it by the end of the week. Why? Because I it was an empty promise to myself. I didn't do it with any heart or conviction; or I wouldn't have bought the wine that I ended up drinking. And when I tried to limit the volume of alcohol I drank each time, well that was just laughable. By the time that first glass had been drunk, all the best intentions went out of the window. I was drinking more, and the repercussions were tomorrow's problem. That's inevitable, by the way. The very nature of alcohol is such that it gives you that 'buzz', and makes itself very morish...

I think the biggest shift in my personal relationship with alcohol was realising that I will never be able to moderate it. I am just not that person. I've always loved a drink; I probably drank more than most people I know, and that was unlikely to change unless I made it change. I had to remove it from my life. Accepting that was probably the hardest thing to do, and it took a while. There was a gambit of emotions that came with that too; shame, fear, guilt, more shame, a bit of self hatred... that took some time.

If this resonates with you, you may be at a bit of a sticking point. Where do you go from here? How can the next change you make be the last change you make? Being in that place can feel frightening, lonely and really bloody overwhelming.

So is it time to try working with a sobriety coach? You see, coaching can help. I can only speak from how I work with clients, but as I coach I am there to guide my clients through changing that relationship with alcohol. Practically, we look at how to navigate it. We look at the whys, the hows, the wheres ... and the what now? We look at how to get you through the events, the holidays, the nights in... How to navigate your stress, your guilt and everything else you're up against now that reliable crutch is no longer there. And, in time, as not drinking becomes more normal for you - we work on how your new, sober life is going to look. Where you will focus your time, energy and efforts going forward.

It's a process, but it's not a process you have to tackle alone. As your coach, I'm there to help you work out what you need, what you want and how you will achieve it. I'm not here to tell you what to do, or provide you with a 'one size fits all' plan. We work together to work out what you need; what challenges you may encounger; how you what to track your progress. We work around you as the individual to facilitate you giving yourself the best chance to achieve the life you want.